Die Fledermaus

Want the polar opposite of the Vienna Opera?  Go to Salzburg!  We just saw Strauss’s Die Fledermaus at the Landestheater.  How best to explain this – have you seen the opera?  Read the libretto?  Or just checked out the synopsis on Wikipedia?  The masked ball takes place on an Emirates Air flight, including the ballet scene made up of flight attendants.  Prince Orlovsky is a sheik.  The tete-a-tete in which Rosalinde relieves Eisenstein of his watch appears to be a Mile High Club membership in the WC.  The champagne song has oxygen masks dropping from the flies.  There are parachutes.  Confetti lands on the audience.  Four guys rip off their shirts.  And the European Union is both mocked and celebrated with references to ouzo, Athens Champagne, and a bunch of stuff we didn’t get because it was in German.  It could be argued that the actual music was better in Vienna, but Salzburg has them beat on costumes, sets, pantomime, makeup (no hideous blackface), dance, color, and joie de vivre.  Plus, the opera house here in Salzburg isn’t insanely hot, and the bottled water is cheaper.

Final Christmas Market

Upon arriving in Salzburg, we hit the final day of the Christmas Market in the Cathedral Square.  I know it's shameful, but I finally achieved my belgian waffle here.  I'm not even capitalizing it because it was in Austria.

And by the way, doesn't Lindsey look good with the tree?

Vienna Wrap Up

Lindsey and I toddled off for an early visit to the Imperial Treasury.  Starting with the Albertina, then the Belvedere, then the Schonbraun – we had noticed a substantial number of dead mammal-ish things hanging from men’s necklaces.  By day two we had figured out that they were insignias of the Order of the Golden Fleece (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Order_of_the_golden_fleece).  We kept spotting them all over Vienna.  Today, we saw the actual items.  Creepy looking sheep.  Other oddities: narwhal horn being passed off as “unicorn”; way too many reliquaries holding bones of various saints, table cloths, and hilariously – two holy lances; and on the tabard of Antwerp what Lindsey referred to as “Jazz hands!”

After collecting our luggage and bidding a fond adieu (since we still haven’t learned any German) to our hotel, we are off to Salzburg!

Christmas

You knew it had to happen.  The Vienna Boy's Choir.  Christmas Mass.  Haydn.  In the Hofmusikkapelle.  And just to be clear - Lindsey and I are POLITE tourists.  We didn't take pictures during mass.  This was before they started.

Then we went for a walk to shake off the incense and stretch our legs.  It's been cold and quite foggy in Vienna.  Very atmospheric, but less than ideal conditions for photography.  Lindsey insisted on seeing some buildings, I others.  So here we are kids, Big Ben....Parliament.

We swung by Palace Ephrussi.  If you haven't done so by now, pick up a copy of 'The Hare with the Amber Eyes'.  It's a fascinating book and so timely with my journeys through Paris and Vienna.  But I think I'll skip the Odessa part for now.  Tokyo tho....

After our walk we went to the Sacher Hotel (famous for the torte) and checked into the spa.  Where I enjoyed a completely decadent chocolate scrub and massage.  I smell great!  Being so relaxed after that we went for a low key dinner of truffled risotto and ravioli.  Back to the hotel for a bit of Christmas Skyping to the family, now off to sleep.  We have a big day planned for tomorrow!

Art & Christmas Eve

Most of the places we've been the past few days don't allow photography, so you'll have to just put up with my writings about it.  Christmas Eve is the big holiday here, and we accepted the reduced hours and went to the Kunsthistoriches Museum.  Should you ever choose to visit this temple to Hapsburg art shopping, may I recommend a map, a compass, and a healthy supply of trail mix?  We stumbled out of there five hours later.  There may have been babbling.  In fact, I am sure there was babbling.  Something about severed heads...  Judith and Holofernes, Salome and John the Baptist, David and Goliath, even a few Mesusas including a really hideous one by Reubens.  Ultimately, I think we saw dozens and dozens of decapitations.  Yeuch.

We also continued my previously noted trail of dead Jesuses.  Lindsey kept insisting we were celebrating the birth, not the death.  But you wouldn't know it from the corpses piled up in those paintings.

Of course, the funniest moment was when we had just arrived and were still fresh and enthusiastic.  I was excited to note that the scaffolding is still up on the grand staircase and told Lindsey, "that's what we've come to see!"  The incredulous look she gave me was notable.  However, I had good reason.  Klimt did some of the murals near the ceiling of the room, and the scaffolding allows visitors to see them close up.  

The Christmas Market in Theresien Platz was still going outside the museum.  You may see here my "tiara".  Lindsey bought Christmas headbands.  Mine has bells on it.  She has a bow.  As you can see in the photo from our Christmas Eve dinner.  At Der Kuckkuck Restaurant.  And here's what we had:

http://www.derkuckuck.com/Restaurant_Der_Kuckuck_English/Restaurant_Der_Kuckuck_en_Weihnachten_files/Weihnachten%202011.pdf  

Schonbrunn Palace

Sleeting.  Brrrr.  But very pretty.

Uber Vienna

Ah, Vienna!  I haven’t posted in a while because I’ve been too darn busy.  And possibly because I have Lindsey here to share it all with!  Thus far we have viewed the collections at the Albertina and Belvedere Museums, seen the complete Handel’s Messiah, seen Verdi’s Otello at the State Opera House, watched the morning exercises of the Lipizanner Stallions of the Spanish Riding School, eaten Weiner schnitzel and cake at Demel, and climbed the south tower of St. Stephan’s Cathedral (to burn off the cake).  All told, we are excellent tourists!!

And schnitzel must be eaten with potato salad and beer.

Oh, did I mention we had prosecco with our cake?

Lindsey and the St. Stephan Cathedral Tower.

Vienna is really magical at Christmastime.  There are lights everywhere.  Markets in all the squares are selling hot spiced wine, hot cider, and a mysterious object called a “puffer”.  It seems to be some kind of potato pancake.  Get it with sour cream – delicious.

We have been to two musical performances are and are scheduled for four more before we make it out of this town.  Handel, Verdi, Mozart, Strauss, Schubert, Haydn….  It’s amazing.  That said, while the music of Otello was gorgeous, the sets, lighting, and costumes were perhaps the ugliest I’ve ever seen.  Lindsey’s awesome comment, “is this Otello: the cage match?”  Metal mesh curtains, chain link fencing sliding panels, and running video of moving clouds playing across the back.  And the costumes were basically bathrobes and babushka headscarves.  Ugh! 

Love Padlocks

While on the train passing through Cologne, I noticed padlocks adorning the bridge.  Here in Heidelberg I saw them again.  I looked closer and saw the engraving.  Wikipedia supplied the background:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Love_padlocks

Heidelberg

Here I am in Heidelberg.  Not for any particular reason.  It was a reasonable stopping point between Brussels and Vienna (where I need to be on 19 Dec, in order to meet Lindsey).  I think I picked it for the anthropologically romantic notion of seeing Homo heidelbergensis.  But of course, only a replica is on display.  However, the Old Town is a lovely place, and the Christmas markets are in full swing here.  I expect to be spending quality time in them until the Advent.  One enormous boost being that they make it socially acceptable to both eat and drink while standing and walking (not always acceptable in Europe), making for cheaper meals and social interaction.  Plus, free gingerbread tastings at every corner!

I did climb the hill to see the Schloss this morning.  It was interesting enough and brought to mind the notion that castle builders must have been rather good with hydro engineering.  What with the rain, snowmelt, and random springs, building good gutters and drainage is a must.  The Schloss is a good example of what can go wrong if your powder is stored inappropriately.  Illustration of destroyed tower below:

And as you can see, I am getting better at the selfie (aka longarm per Claire’s lingo).  The problem has arisen that every time I try to practice, some very friendly fellow tourist offers with gestures to take my camera and snap me.  I wouldn’t precisely call it frustrating, but it is amusing.  I keep waiting for someone, anyone, to be rude, nasty, impatient, or otherwise unpleasant.  Hasn’t happened.

Bizarrely, I was getting quite good at French while in Brussels, and even managed decently in Flemish.  I am quite lost in German.  However, I’ve got at least another 12 days to work up to a semblance of understanding.  I expect to be lost again once I switch the Czech, and then there is Greek and Turkish….  Really, there was never any point in trying to pick up a language before beginning this jaunt.  I continue to do well with my menu linguistics – I’m polishing off a nice prawn and arugula pasta with a glass of wine, followed by tiramisu.  One cannot live on wurst alone.

In the interests of education and amusement, I am reading Mark Twain’s Innocents Abroad.  It seems most apt.  Tho’ I will admit to reading Nancy Mitford’s Christmas Pudding while staying in Brussels, borrowed from my hosts.  It should have been Christmassy, but her brand of character assassination isn’t precisely Christian, is it?  She’s like a viperous P.G. Wodehouse, in the best possible way.